she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Randomize
