Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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