Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
