but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize