i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
