You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize