Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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