The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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