apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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