If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Someone signed my nipple.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize