distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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