Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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