I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
