Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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