We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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