I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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