Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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