So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
