Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
dude. I can hear the air.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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