Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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