You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
