well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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