Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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