For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
i dont even know how to be here
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
