he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
