We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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