Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
