Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
