well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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