she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
