So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Randomize
