Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
