Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize