So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
