i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
