You're so nebulous sometimes
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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