too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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