I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
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