You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
my nose is crying tears of wow.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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