my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize