so that wasnt chicken after all
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Im part way to drunk.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
