You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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