At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
