I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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