But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
