Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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