Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize