I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
