just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Randomize
