Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Randomize
