I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Such a big mess for such a small penis
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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